Left behind on an open court. I feel the new day that awaits bleak and bitter surrounds make entirely implausible. It feels so far away. It's as if the dense forest that is wrapped around the heart of "Queensland" (so-to-speak) stretches forever on it's own separate X-axis. Sometimes I feel as if I'm running for no reason. Then I look back, I know I HAVE a reason, but it seems I'm sort of wasting time running for the future when it's just a moment away. It's too many moments away.
Along with the dense macabre around these circumstances, there's also those "forbidden" fan-tas-ies that appear so...bizarre to take a part in. Those little whispers that are following with a long soreness and a looming blue. And they're so inviting. I know it's the "wrong" thing to do. But since I know there will be no regrets (and probable benefits) after-the-fact, and s bit of a long sigh if it didn't, isn't it the right thing to do? Of course, that's probably just propaganda. But that oddness added with this extended labyrinth makes me feel as if it's some sort of odd dream while I'm wide awake.
The future is so far away. But were already making plans for it. Does that make it more plausible? No. Moment's spread across forever, and I long for chance to take in the smell of the smoke that fills my lungs. Fairytales might get me thru the mountain tops, but they're just fairy tales. They're no realer then that next moment is. But the sands runs and the hands tics; I suppose I should try to be a "human" in a human world and live w/o taking a thought aside to find the real way out of the labyrinth. I should just...calm down and be patient while the carbon turns to diamond.